How to Stop Struggling Through the Holidays
Published Dec 5, 2023
By Rachael Nitz
Sometimes the holidays just suck!
Not everyone enjoys the holidays.
Some people want to but find it hard.
Others have been stuck in a rut every holiday season which makes it that much worse every year.
And others still are suffering through mental health issues or the loss of a loved one that seem to get worse when stress gets higher.
If this is you and you feel some sort of way as we near Christmas, this article is for you!
And, for the record, it’s ok to feel that way.
Not everyone gets all holly jolly for the holidays.
So, what to do?
I’ve complied a list of scenarios and ways to help you cope:
- When you just aren’t feeling the “holiday spirit”
The holidays come with a whole different set of challenges. Chief among them may be feeling like you just aren’t as happy and excited about social events as others.
It’s ok!
You don’t HAVE to feel happy all the time and it’s ok to acknowledge that you just aren’t feeling it right now.
Stay away from alcohol if you’re using it to change your feelings (numb feelings or to “let loose”).
Try to surround yourself with people who understand what you’re going through and sit with you in your less-than-cheery self without guilting you into feeling some way that you don’t.
- You’re struggling through grief and loss
Grief and loss are some pretty crappy situations to be in and it makes holidays even worse.
Sometimes we get caught in this trap of comparing ourselves to others and comparing what they have and we don’t. This only makes you feel lonelier.
Take some time to really check in with your feelings and emotions and remember that some things will be different.
Maybe that means starting some new traditions or making time to remember old ones.
Most importantly, spend time with the ones you love.
Don’t hide yourself away.
Let friends and family know what they can do to help you through this tough time.
(P.S. if you are currently suffering through some grief and loss right now, I want you to reach out to a trusted person and as them to pray over and for you. You are not alone.)
- Gift giving is stressing you out
I feel that this year, this stress is pretty high for most people.
Let’s face it…
It’s been a rough year and money may be tight.
Here’s what I want you to remember:
Christmas is not about the gifts.
It’s just not!
In the last few years, my husband and I have really focused on finding experiences we can do with our family that don’t cost as much as gifts we would otherwise give but create so many memories that it’s way more worth it.
But, I understand that not everyone is at that stage so here are a few things you can try out to cut costs this Christmas:
-Consider a Secret Santa or White Elephant exchange to cut costs this year
-Create something personal. I LOVE handmade gifts from the heart and it’s something we do each year for our family too.
-Give the gift of your time. Is there something that family member or friend really needs help with? My family is all chipping in time to help my mom FINALLY finish her kitchen and its better than any gift we could have gotten her.
Gifts don’t have to cost us money.
Get creative and find another way.
- The shorter days are really getting to you
With the holidays come earlier sunsets and later sunrises.
Days are shorter.
The sun isn’t out as much.
It’s cold as you-know-what.
And we just aren’t outside as much.
This affects all areas of your mental health.
Try to get as much sunlight as possible.
Try to get outside at least once a day.
Work near a window if you can swing it.
And if it feels like you just can’t do it on your own, talk to someone!
- You’re feeling alone
Not all of us get to spend the holidays with family and it’s natural for that to make things feel a little more lonely than usual.
Fight that urge to hide out and stay away from people.
Reach out to a friend or two.
Have a facetime date or go grab coffee.
Take advantage of different ways to connect with others (holiday cards, social media, texts, calls, etc.).
And don’t forget to take care of yourself.
Bottom line… not everyone enjoys the holidays and everyone will have a different reason for it.
But there are things to try and resources to reach out to.
And I bet you know someone who may feel the same.
